How to ensure that your Wedding Ceremony is what YOU want

 

My wedding was crap!

Don’t get me wrong, I’m still married to the love of my life, 34 years later! But our wedding ceremony was crap!

Why? Because it wasn’t about us, it was all about other people and what they wanted and what they thought was right and wrong or proper and improper.

Sounds crazy, doesn’t it? But so many couples compromise on the most precious and special day of their lives and give in to, or try to please, other people at the expense of their own happiness and wishes!

We were happy at the time, but looking back, as you do, we have realised for a long time, because the camera never lies, that our wedding day did not tell the story of who we were or our love for each other. 

What did we do wrong?

Well, we didn’t let our wedding ceremony reflect who we were as a couple. We let our wedding keep my in-laws happy! Otherwise, they wouldn’t have let us get married. So, a lot of compromises meant we could get married.

But Why! Why did we put up with that and allow other people’s wishes and biases etc. dictate our big day and our lifelong memories of getting married?! It was a different culture then but still, we should have done things the way we wanted them.

We all do things that we regret. But, please don’t make compromises with your wedding ceremony. Make sure that it reflects both of you as individuals and as a couple. After all, it will be a lifelong memory and you don’t want it to be crap, right?

Who are you?

‘Your day, your way’. That is the motto of Fab Ceremonies! Your wedding ceremony must reflect and focus on, and champion, who you both are! Otherwise, you will feel deflated and compromised.

Why should you compromise on the most important day of your lives?

 

So, what am I saying?

I am saying that I wish that I could go back and marry my wife all over again, but do it our way! I am also saying that you shouldn’t be wishing, any time in the future, that you could go back in time and do it all over again, the way you wanted it to be.

Do it your way now!

What would I have done differently?

I would have been true to myself and true to my lovely bride. So instead of having Giuseppe Verdi, Entrance of the Queen of Sheba as she walked down the aisle, played on an old piano by a balding pianist called Mike, which I’d never heard of before! We would have had ‘Something in the Way She Moves’ by The Beatles.

I would have had a Celebrant…

Instead of the, very nice, church leader, I would have had a celebrant led ceremony that was all about my bride and me! Not about the church or the bible and cosy stories from a bygone era. I like those stories, but not at a wedding. Weddings are not about celebrating the past, they are about celebrating you, now! Of course, we look to the past for inspiration and guidance, but only if that is relevant to who we are. Not if it is all about keeping someone else happy.

Remember, it is not their wedding, it is yours!

So, if you want Goth, Retro, Boho, Vintage, DO IT! If you want a fairy-tale Princess wedding, GO FOR IT! But please do not compromise, except between your significant other and you.

Music…

Well, if you have looked at my website you will already have a feel for who I am. Now, make sure you have a ceremony that has the feel for who you are. So have the music that you want and do not compromise on this because, just like my wife and me, you won’t get to do it again and you don’t want it to be crap!

I am a Mod and a lover of Indie, Brit Pop and Rock. I love Fred Perry and Dr Martens as well as Pretty Green and Ben Sherman clothes. But that is who I am, unashamedly!

If you want ‘All You Need Is Love’ courtesy of The Beatles, then why not?

 

I love celebrating the love of couples (all couples!). But what is most exciting is when I know that they are being themselves! Ah, that is so human and so beautiful to be involved with!

The beauty of a celebrant led wedding is that your celebrant will always keep the both of you at the centre of everything. Your celebrant will make sure that everything, from the music that you walk down the aisle or make an entrance to, to the music that you both exit to, and everything in between, is what you have chosen and what makes you who you are.

 

Vows…

‘To have and to hold’, ‘to honour and obey’, ‘till death do us part’. Nice, if that is true to who you are and is what you want to say to each other.

We had no choice! It was either those vows or no vows. Cheryl, my wife, must have had her fingers crossed, coz she’s never obeyed me anyway! And I wouldn’t expect her to either, marriage is a relationship not a dictatorship.

So, let me round this up by saying ‘please don’t have a crap wedding!’

There are lots of options and very few limitations. So if you want to do it your way, you can!

Remember, It’s All About You!